I’ve always had this thought, or fucked up idea, that one day I would rent a cement truck and dump a giant pile of cement in front of someone’s driveway. Obviously someone I didn’t like. I always thought-how loud could a cement truck be? If the person is a heavy sleeper they could probably get through it without waking up.

Holy fuck was I wrong. Not that I have tried this (yet), but I was woken up at 6:30am by a cement truck four houses away. My god, I wished I was dead every second of it so I could close my eyes for a bit longer. I can’t believe how loud it was. It was thunderous and drawn out.

As if the tumbling and roar of the engine wasn’t enough, whoever is driving it is apparently part of some reverse contest, where he wants to see how many times he can shift into reverse in the matter of a few minutes. The constant and somehow inconsistent beeping is making my skin itch.

This hangover is bad enough on its own. Now, coupled with the cement truck, I stare up at the ceiling praying for the good brown lord to strike me dead and end my misery.

I’m hungover and tired and I can’t sleep. These were my thoughts.