We’ve all thought about it. We’ve all walked next to someone and thought, “The world would be a better place without this piece of shit.” But most of us will never have the courage to act upon it. This girl however, tried to be a hero, probably.

Truthfully we’ll never know if this girl is a hero or not because there is zero chance she comes forward. For all we know, the thinner girl wore the same outfit as this bad bitch, and she thought to herself, “there’s no way I’m going to look like the fatter version of Marissa”, and threw her big hips right into her side, launching her towards doom. Also, such a Marissa thing to do, wearing the same outfit as her more portly friend. A lot of people would probably say the punishment fits the crime. Not me though. I’d never say that.

Let’s get to the video. I don’t know how to just pull the video, because I’m an idiot, so I just screen-recorded it.

What an actress! Get this bad bitch a goddamn Grammy!

The second, and I mean the second she realizes her friend isn’t dead she totally changes her tune, and tries helping her, like she wasn’t the one who caused it. This girl was about four inches from her head getting popped like a zit.

Maybe the fakest hug on the planet. I got a better and more sincere hug from my date to the homecoming dance in 10th grade who told me she was gonna go to this other dudes house to “probably blow him.” It’s hard to be mad looking back because because they’re married now. Must have been a great blowjob.

And to everyone who is giving Marissa any guff for not fighting this girl, uhm, would you try and fight someone who is crazy enough to murder you in broad daylight? She’s also got like 40 pounds on her.

Hope you’re safe now Marissa, my DMs are open.