Molto Mario Is Probably A Scumbag

Mario mother fucking Batali. That human cranberry spritzer is the latest celebrity to be taken down a few pegs by some harassment and sex abuse claims. When Twitter started chirping late last night that a celeb Chef was about to get thrown into the mix I was positive it was going to be that little creep Bobby Flay. I just figured he pulled his little hot pepper out in front of some chicks Louis CK style. I’m stunned it’s not him. Stunned!


I grew up watching Molto Mario waltz his fat ass back and forth across my television as he would make complex dishes look incredibly easy. But just because you’re good with a hot pan and some seasonings doesn’t mean you’re not a piece of shit. And unfortunately that’s the case with this orange haired Italian as he has recently been accused of sexual harassment. And while he hasn’t been charged with anything yet, the fact that he has taken a leave from doing anything with any of his million restaurants, is probably not a good sign.

Not only is he a chef and a scumbag, but he’s a fashion icon.

mario batali

Imagine this being your look? Yellow crocs, cargo shorts, a vest, a short sleeved shirt and a scarf. This is why he had to be a fucking creep, no one in the right mind would want to fuck this shaved lion in a gap vest.

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