So there was an eclipse…

So there was an eclipse and holy shit did people react like they just won the fucking lottery. I for one, up until now, didn’t care about solar eclipses. That was until I lived through one. Lets set the scene.

I was hanging out at my parents house in their pool because it was nice out and I wanted to work on my tan. So I’m just sitting there floating around on a tube, sipping a daiquiri counting down the minutes until it happens when BOOM! There it was. The moon was in front of the sun. I totally blacked out- out of joy. Ten minutes must have passed because when I came to the moon was no longer in sight and I was kissing out with my neighbors husband. It was a wild few minutes as we tried to explain to his wife what had happened.

In reality nothing happened. I wasn’t outside for it because I didn’t care. I almost never care about the sun and whatever hijinks it’s getting in to. If the sun was doing something awesome like shooting fireballs at the moon or Philadelphia I probably would have watched but I’m not about to tune in to the moon and sun passing by each other. There is nothing exciting about that.

The worst part about it, like I said in my Facebook post was going to be the blurry zoomed in pictures of the sun that were going to be forced in my face. Let’s take a look at some of my favorites from the eclipse:


Thank you to whoever posted this one as you circled it so all the mouth breathers know exactly where to look. Thanks!


Not sure why the fuck this one has a hint of green? Maybe it’s a science phenomenon. Maybe it’s a filter. I’m not sure, but it sure is ominous.


I’m actually not mad at this one at all. It sort of looks like the suns butthole, which I obviously like. Also it’s nice and grainy, which I’m also a huge fan of.


Another nice grainy one. These ones for sure are my favorite. This one shows the moon coming up from the bottom which I like. It’s like the moon is just sneaking up from behind something. Big fan.


I’ll be honest, I don’t know what the fuck I’m looking at in this picture and that makes me love it. This picture has everything: grainy brightness, clouds, random dark spots in the sky; you really can’t beat it.

Anyway I hope the sun is proud of itself for clogging up my Facebook and Instagram.

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