The Mets Get This Weeks Bag of Dicks Award

The god damn Mets.

mr met hangs himself

I don’t even know where to start. I can’t yell at my television loud enough. No matter how loud I get Terry Collins can’t hear my cries for him to go and fuck himself. Cespedes can barely swing a bat… let him play! Thor is sore and not feeling to hot… sit him for a game then throw him in. Who is letting him make these decisions?

Oh that’s right, Sandy Alderson. I won’t shit on him too much, sort of. I mean, he did do a great job of getting the Mets nice young talent in Thor and Wheeler, but in terms of day to day management, he can eat a dick. He needs to step up and tell Terry Collins to take a long walk through Queens until he hits the Lower Bay and from there I don’t know, just start swimming east.

Seriously, giving up 23 runs to the Nationals is an unforgiveable act, like funding terrorism or putting Legos up your cats asshole. Once the Nats hit 20 runs Terry should have walked out into the middle of the field and just taken a shit and left the stadium. At least then I’d have some respect for him. They’re going to lose 100 games at this pace.

I could keep going for a thousand words but I don’t want to get any more angry than I already am. Also, it’s nice out and I want to drink beer.

So here it is Mets, your Bag of Dicks Award:


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